Monday, March 23, 2009

Choosing a spouse

I have recently been confronted with the question of how to choose your marriage partner. Do you go for "love", or potential financial stability? What if there is a commitment made, but another opportunity arises that may seem a better fit?

In doing a simple Google search for "how to choose a husband," the following sites proved interesting:

eHow's "How to Choose a Husband"
Choosing the right husband is just as important as choosing the right shoes that go with the handbag, that goes with the belt, that goes with the dress, that goes with the house that Jack built. Wait a minute, something in that sentence isn't right . . .

Back to the point: Marriage is or, rather, should be a lifetime commitment. With that in mind, there are a number of qualities a woman must keep in mind when choosing her partner.

Read the the four steps here.

Ezine Articles' "10 Low EQ (Emotional Intelligence) Ways to Choose a Husband"
In choosing the right man for you, you need to use your Emotional Intelligence (EQ).
Here are 10 LOW EQ ways to do it that will guarantee disaster.

1. Choosing the obvious ones to avoid.
2. Choosing by sexual attraction alone.
3. Choosing by externals alone.
4. Rushing.
5. Rushing.
6. Rushing.
7. Not checking out his attitude toward women.
8. Trusting only your intellect.
9. Trusting only your feelings.
10. Misunderstanding the nature of feelings.

Read the details here.

Your Tango's "How To Choose A Husband: Dating advice from a priest via The New York Times."
Trumping news of war, health, food, pets or fashion, the most e-mailed item currently on The New York Times' site is Maureen Dowd's column from July 6 called "An Ideal Husband."

In light of celebrity divorces stealing recent headlines, Dowd turned to a man whose motto on marriage would have to be "Do as I say, not as I do": a Catholic priest.

His advice is not of the "Thou shalt..." variety, in fact spirituality is mentioned only as a cautionary tale of the heartache experienced after the failed marriage of a devout Catholic and a devout Muslim. Instead he offers tidbits that, regardless of one's take on marriage or religion, serve as good guidelines for choosing a partner. To list a few:

  • avoid mother-obsessed men
  • a man with close friends and family signals an openness to intimacy
  • watch out for financial inequality or irresponsibility
  • laugh! a sense of humor is hugely important

That NYT readers were compelled to e-mail love and marriage advice during the past three days more than any other story reminds me of the tale about survivors of harrowing experiences, like war, who–more than anything else including the trauma itself–talk about the person they were crushing on or the one who got away during these times of stress. Ah, love.

Read the full article here.

Search Your Love's "Choose a Husband"
Whatever they tell, men marry. Men marry young, marry late in life, marry for the second and the third time. Nowadays it is rather difficult to find a real “never-marry” man. However, each has his own reason and motives to lead her down the aisle. Let us try to divide men into 8 categories, based on the reasons for making marriage proposal.

Read the 8 categories here.

Happy reading!


  1. so, uh, what is really on your mind? You gonna get married soon?

  2. The alternate title was going to be "A Marriage Proposal (of sorts)"

    It was an interesting weekend at my uncle's house for sure.